When dating a man, it is easy to project our expectations on him, which can lead us into skewing our perception and not seeing him for him. My advice? Let him be a blank canvas and let him be the painter of himself. Then, you can view his masterpiece and see if it fits in your home decor.
The same goes for when dating a woman. It is easy for men to project their hurt from a previous relationship onto their prospective partners, only to end up pushing them away. So let her be a blank canvas and let her paint herself with no assistance from you. That way, you too, can view her masterpiece and see if it fits in your art gallery.